WolfieToons by Dave Wolfe

WolfieToons by Dave Wolfe

Tuesday, November 26, 2013

The WolfieBlog Sing Along!!

In the spirit of Spike Jones, Stan Freberg, "MAD" magazine, and "Weird Al" Yankovic, here are some spankin' song parodies just for giggles!  

The first one Larken did for my birthday, back in March,  to the tune of Peter, Paul and Mary's "Puff the Magic Dragon!"  And here's a new cartoon to go with it!



Dave the Magic Wolfie howls at the moon,
And frolics on the Interwebs, and draws those WolfieToons.
Little spanking capers, all that kinky stuff,
Swats and stings and ouchy things, he never gets enough!
Oh…

Dave the Magic Wolfie howls at the moon,
And frolics on the Interwebs, and draws those WolfieToons.
Dave the Magic Wolfie howls at the moon,
And frolics on the interwebs, and draws those WolfieToons.

Forever he is drawing, transforming bottoms pale.      
Wolfie does his own research on rosening girl's tails.
Forever he is searching for bottoms plump and round;
Naughty Imps will lower their pants when Wolfie comes around.

Dave the Magic Wolfie howls at the moon,
And frolics on the Interwebs, and draws those WolfieToons.
Dave the Magic Wolfie howls at the moon,
And frolics on the interwebs, and draws those WolfieToons.

Spanks don't sting forever, despite our protest noise;
But painted bums and penciled puns will always bring us joys.
Today is Wolfie's birthday, the Dave that we adore;
The day he started on this path, to make us Imps so sore.

His head's full of tomorrow, planning his next toon.
Wolfie's got an itch, you see, to spank some Imps real soon.
He is our life-long friend, so the Imps must all be brave;
We'll take his birthday spankings now, and Happy Birthday, Dave!

Dave the Magic Wolfie howls at the moon,
And frolics on the Interwebs, and draws those WolfieToons.
Dave the Magic Wolfie howls at the moon,
And frolics on the interwebs, and draws those WolfieToons.

And you oughta hear her actually sing that!!  

Here's one I did while the wind was sweeping down the plains.  Sing it to "Surrey With the Fringe On the Top" from Rodgers and Hammerstein's "Oklahoma!" 






Chicks and Imps and Teases better scurry
when I git th’ paddle in a hurry!
When I git my paddle in a hurry,
I’m a furry Top!

Watch that lace and see how it flutters!
I’ll reduce th’ brats down to stutters!
Noisy Imps will learn not to mutter or
they’ll get a POP!

They’ll squeal and holler when turned upside down,
’cause my paddle’s gen-u-wine leather!
The Imps have panties y’ can roll down
to make them all behave better!

Two bright cheeks, can’t get any redder!
Now she squeaks, “Oh, please, I’ll do better!”
You can bet your butt that she’d better
or her rear I’ll strop!
I’m the funny furry critter who’s a
firm, loving Top!!”

Maybe some day I'll write more of that!  Sometimes a snippet will do, like this one derived from Disney's "Mary Poppins!"




When she was just a little lass, inclined to pull a prank,
Her nanny put her on her knee and gave her butt a spank!
And then one day she learned a word that quite explained her zeal,
the biggest word you ever heard to tell you how it feels!
Oh! Superswatafragilesitspotohitisdelicious!
And you'll sit quite carefully, it tingles and it itches!
Superswatafragilesitspotohitisdelicious!
Superswatafragilesitspotohitisdelicious!


And now, one of my very favorites, the one Larken wrote and posted on Season and Michael's "BLOSSOM AND THORN" blog!  Any Dean Martin fans here?  You'll really get a kick out of this improved version of "That's Amore!"  



(In Spankoli, where love is King, when Top Meets Imp, here's what they say)

When the moon hits His eye 'cause you're over His thigh
That's amore!
When He makes your tush shine 'cause you've had too much wine
That's amore!
Imps will sing, what's that thing, ouch what sting
But they'll sing a cappella!
Imps will prance; they will dance, without pants
Like a hot tarantella!

When your Top is old school and He makes a new rule,
That's amore!
When you dance on His lap with each loud ouchy slap,
You're in love!
When you're spanked 'til you gleam
It's your dream, and you might want some-more-ay
Scuzza me, but you see, back in old Spankoli
That's amore!




When His spoon makes you cry 'cause you did not comply
That's amore!
When His brush makes you whine 'cause you stepped out of line
That's amore!
Tops will say, "Imps obey."
You might stray, and 'cause you're not vanilla
You'll be tipped,
Over all the way,
Spanked without delay,
He's a real Toppy fella!

You're an angel all day, and you just want to play
That's amore!
Then Top Logic appears and you're flipped OTK
You're in love!
When your life is a dream that's come true, you adore your Signore!
You lie over His knee and you're spanked happily,
That's amore!



Standing ovation, lovely Larken!!  

By the way, that last dotted derriere is a detail from the current cartoon over at "DISCIPLINE & DESIRE!"  Believe it or not, it's a Thanksgiving 'toon!

And if you feel inspired, please feel free to contribute your riffs below, or e-mail 'em to me and I'll edit this entry! 


15 comments:

  1. Wolfie and Larken, stand up and take a bow. *the audience stands and cheers for an encore* Great job, both of you.

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    1. Thank you, Kaki! I always let Larken bow in front of me. Heh heh. Her parodies are always brilliant, aren't they?!

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  2. Omg!! I love the supercalifragilisticexpalidocious parody!

    And I hope I spelled that correctly!!

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    1. It's a challenge to get that right, Sarah! I always leave out a letter or two. Don't know how the Sherman Brothers came up with that in the first place!!

      One of these days I'll have to find and read a couple of the original Mary Poppins books; I hear they're rather different! I did read several Mrs. Piggle-Wiggle books.

      But I digress-- thank you, glad you liked it! I should write more on that one!

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  3. Thanks, Kaki!

    LOL! I don't think I've seen those parodies of yours before, DW! Have I?

    SuperWHAT?! HA HA! Hey, I'm not bowing in front of you! That could be dangerous!

    Oh, and FYI - there is NO magic wand in Magic Wolfie's song! Hrumph.

    ;-)

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    1. Oh, the wand is implicit in the text, Larken! Magical Ouchy Things!

      But you should acknowledge the thunderous applause, so by all means, take your bow! I will be applauding, too!

      I'd kinda forgotten I'd done those particular parodies, myself! Amazing what you find in your closets!

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  4. Oh! And did I mention how much I LOVE the Dave the Magic Wolfie cartoon?! ;-) I love it! All of it! OK, mostly all of it. :-P Especially the sparkly stuff. :-)

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    1. Why, thank you, loveliest of Larkens! Yes, I thought you'd like the spankly stuff best. Hm? Oh, "sparkly." My mistake.

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  5. Apologies for being late to the Parody Party. Good thing it's not the Communist Party or I would be exiled to Siberia, but hey, I live in Minnesota so not much difference. We are currently in the middle of a three day snow storm - Tuesday into Thursday - and already have about 26 inches of snow and still counting. Then a deep freeze is next with temps dropping below 0 tonight and for the next week. Frostbite Falls takes its name seriously.

    Now to the important stuff. Wonderful, Wonderful, Wonderful parodies, Larken! So creative, so inventive, so hilarious! Oh, and DW, yours are pretty good too. ;-)

    Absolutely LOVE, LOVE, LOVE your WolfieToon for "Dave the Magic Wolfie" Your depiction of Larken as a multi-tasking imp (she sings, she plays guitar, she gets her bum warmed!) is perfect. I bet her bare bum matches the the color of her bright red slacks, as it should. The Wolfie Wizard or is it a Wizard Wolfie is a hoot. Fantastic work, DW.

    Larken's "That's Amore!" fantastic parody was given its own guest post on Blossom and Thorn.
    http://seasonandmichael.wordpress.com/2011/11/01/in-spankoli-guest-post-by-larken/

    She truly does deserve a standing ovation which is only fitting as she will be standing for a long while after that spanking DW gave her in that cartoon.

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  6. Damn, link didn't work. Larken's "That's Amore!" parody was published on November 1, 2011.

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    1. Twnety-six inches??! Hokey Smoke, Bullmichael, that really IS Frostbite Falls!! Beats the heck outta the little bit we're having here!

      Oh, yeah, for a link in the Blogger replies one has to employ that damn hypertext-messup-language stuff. I looked it up and so everyone can

      CLICK THIS FOR THE "BLOSSOM AND THORN" LINK!

      Thank you, Mike, glad you enjoyed the take-offs and the cartooning! MAD Magazine was an integral part of my formative years.

      Throw another log on the fire up there!! Throw an Imp over your lap to keep her warm, too! If anyone asks, "WHICH Imp?", well, 'tis the Season. Har.

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  7. DW, thanks for correcting the link. As for throwing an imp over my lap, triple check ✓✓✓ that off the list. We've been having a busy weekend. ;-)

    Wasn't MAD Magazine an integral part of every boy's formative years? I loved it growing up, and the best part is I never bought a copy as I would read my older brother's copy.

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    1. Yes, Mike, it was, and maybe still is. Funny you should mention it, because last week (or maybe the week before) I got an Unsolicited and Free Sample Copy of the New MAD in the mail, asking if I wanted to buy a subscription or gift subscriptions!

      Well, I didn't... I must be too old to get their current topical references or maybe they just aren't that funny any more. I do like Tom Richmond's cartoon caricatures a lot, but he and his writer did a parody of some current crime TV show I've never seen, so it fell flat for me. Sergio Aragones is still doing features and his little cartoons in the page borders, and is still in fine form! There were a couple of other things that raised a chuckle, and this version has a lot more color than MAD of old (actually, not hard to do!!) but nothing that I thought was really worth the "$5.99 CHEAP" (sez you!) cover price!

      Meanwhile, back at the B&T Ranch, I'm glad to hear your happy activity level is unabated! Everyone in the neighborhood will wonder while all the snow and ice is melted from all around your house!

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  8. I heard the first song a long time ago. Is there a way to still hear them?

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    1. I'm delighted to share it again with you. Larken made me laugh and cry at the same time when she did this lovely parody piece for me. You can hear it, accompanied by a bunch of my cartoons, in the embedded video HERE!

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