WolfieToons by Dave Wolfe

WolfieToons by Dave Wolfe

Sunday, February 19, 2012

Fish Tails, Or, "Icthyosoreass"


Ogden Nash (1902-1974) 

Say not the mermaid is a myth, 
I knew one once named Mrs. Smith. 
She stood while playing cards or knitting; 
Mermaids are not equipped for sitting.

I made the same point, albeit not so poetically, back at THIS POST, but it's interesting how often Mermaid Spanking Images show up anyway!

Now, we all grew up with merwomen, 

so, familiarity generally negates the notion that encountering such a creature would be pretty goddamn scary.

Perhaps that's the subtle psychology behind the desire to tame such Faerie Denizens.  Or maybe it's just that Spankophile Imaginations don't really need all that much encouragement 

Thus, the question becomes, where does the Fish End and the Girl Rear Appear? 

(Cartoon by Mike Maihack)

Of course, Ron Howard let us have both versions of Daryl Hannah in "Splash," and God bless him for it.

When the Disney Dudes decided to adapt Hans Christian Andersen's "The Little Mermaid," the director told his designers and animators, "I don't want Ariel to look like a girl wearing a fish costume!"  So pains were taken to make her lower half authentically aquatic. 

However, that never stopped the aforementioned Spankophiles from depicting her over someone's lap in fish form.  I can't find any good images of that right now, but they're out there.  And Dean Yeagle had no problem whatsoever supplying Ariel with cute buttocks in this sketch for a fan:

Girls in Mermaid Suits With Cute Butts always reminds me of the opening of "THE GLASS BOTTOM BOAT,"  a 60's movie in which Doris Day swims onscreen to enchant the customers of her dad's (Arthur Godfrey!) tourist attraction.

Rod Taylor, fishing where he's not supposed to be, snags her mermaid tail and yanks it right off.  They have a heated exchange (ensuring, by romantic comedy rules, that they will end up together by movie's end) and Doris angrily turns tail and swims away.

As we were watching this pic on TV-- lo! so long ago-- my sister squealed with glee, "She's really NOT wearing a bottom!"  and I tried in vain to pierce the water's murkiness to see Doris's lovely naked behind.  I'm sure she was, in fact, wearing SOMETHING, but the notion of seeing Ms Day's uncovered derriere... intrigued me.  I had seen her fanny swatted in a couple of other pictures, and, as Clark Gable confirms in "Teacher's Pet," she had a lovely rump. 

Butt, I digress.

One of the first cartoons I found on-line was of this Old Salt solving our dilemma:

(By the way, Web-Ed has this over at "The Chicago Spanking Forum" on his HUMOR PAGE!)

Most Adult Parody Videos are pretty lame, however, Dallas and Company (As in, "Dallas Spanks Hard!") have created a pretty good one called "I Spank Lucy" that you can preview HERE!   It features Lucy in a show wearing a mermaid costume;  at least until this moment:

Endart did a cartoon returning us to the original idea called "Catch Of The Day."

There is a way around the Half Woman-Half Fish spanking problem that others have suggested;  here is my version:

There could be other problems there.  But, I dunno, she might be a pretty good kisser.


  1. Lol, that last picture cracks me up! I was waiting for the Splash reference. I'm sure many harbor Daryl Hannah spanking fantasies, part fish or not. ;-)

  2. Thanks, Lea! Oh, yes, I'm sure Daryl's on that list!

  3. Love that last picture. Leave it up to you to take a different turn on the half fish half woman lure, complete with hiney. Come to think of it what type of lure would you need to attract a mermaid? It all looks pretty fishy to me.

    I can see it now, octopup, Wolfie with eight spanking arms! Oh! No.

    The Little Mermaid is a favorite in our house, Aerial is a cutie, I like the sketch showing her having a hiney.

  4. LOL!! Octopup is a great cartoon idea, Kaki!

    Thank you, I'm glad you like my take on the half-fish / half woman; There is a Jack Davis cartoon in which he did it better, with a sailor holding her on his lap!

  5. Just look at all those sweet (and one really scary) mermaids.

    *shock* I don't remember Daryl Hannah's bottom from "Splash!" Holy Halibutt!

    So what does a Top do when he finally gets a mermaid over his lap, then can't find her bottom?

    Oh, and about that Bottom with the fishhead… koi vey, DW! :-)

    1. :-D "Koi Vey!!"

      "Fish Heads, Fish Heads, Roly Poly Fish Heads!"

      Yep, the UNcensored version of "Splash" shows Daryl strolling up Liberty Island starkers!! They wouldn't show that on the Family Channel, although I don't know why, 'cause everyone in the family has a bottom!

      Thanks, Larken!! And I will have to ponder your question...

      BUTT-- A mermaid in a wheel chair didn't start with Bette Midler, but back in the 50's with Superman's mermaid college girlfriend, Lori Lemaris. Just so you know.

  6. Wow! You're right! Who knew? It doesn't look like Lori ever got spanked, though. Maybe Superman couldn't find her bottom! And how many times did Lori get killed off and resurrected?! Gees, comic books are so soap opera-y. :-)

    And here the Divine Miss M was complaining that Lady Gaga stole her act!

    Oh, well. I still love Bette. :-)

    1. Yes, me, too, Larken!

      And you may be right, Superman couldn't locate Lori's tush. He'll have to call in Batman, the world's greatest detective.

  7. Fish Heads!! One of my all time favorite Dr. Demento songs. You need a heart thingy.

    1. :-D

      I like that one, too, Kaki!! Although my *favorite* Dr. Demento-featured fishy song is Kip Addotta's "Wet Dream!"

  8. Loved the mermaid special and your take on the half-woman, half-fish problem (and thanks for the plug). Truly, we spanko Tops have long been plagued by the question: how do we spank a mermaid? The presence of Lori Lemaris and Atlantis was one of the things that made DC such a weird place. She really didn't fit into the Superman mythos at all, and since we never got so much as a Lois-spanking, a Lori-spanking would have been too much to ask for.

  9. Thanks, Web-Ed!

    The Mermaid Special, $1.99 All Day!

    Glad you got a grin from it!

  10. Let's not forgot a very significant mermaid spanking. On the original Ricardo (Wrath of Khan-Spy Kids) Montalban Fantasy Island the mysterious Mr. Rourke spanked Michelle Phillips of the Mamas and the Papas in her re-occurring Fantasy Island role as the Mermaid Princess Nyah during her Little Mermaidish fantasy of growing legs and becoming human to pick up guys. As for Lori the Mermaid, her being the only one of Superman's three main girlfriends not to be spanked may be one of the reasons she never became as popular as Lois or Lana and ended up getting stuck as the love interest of the seriously dysfunctional psychopath Superboy Prime.

    1. I remember the Rourke-Nyah spanking very well, Jim! My wife-to-be and I saw it one Saturday night while making out on the couch. :D (Isn't "Nyah" the noise impudent tongue-sticker-outers make?) Anyway, if anyone missed it, it's on YouTube these days! Probably Chross has it in his video list as well!

      MMmm! Superboy Prime, cooked to order, with grilled onions and peppered fries!

      Thanks for you comments! Please excuse my tardy reply, there's been a series of family emergencies back here that have kept me busy!

    2. P.S.-- I've seen and enjoyed several of your clever composites, Jim, very nice job!